In the future we'll all be gay
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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