I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
