she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
