She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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