But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Randomize
