Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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