We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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