I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
