Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
