He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
