How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
