I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
