Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
