Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
