I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
