i need an iv and a liver transplant
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize