So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
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