no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize