I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
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