id be glad to
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Randomize
