I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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