he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
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