Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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