haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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