He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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