i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
