i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
