My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I wish there were birth control emojis
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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