There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
