I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
