You're completely useless in the revolution.
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
