i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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