Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Randomize
