We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize