who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
