Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
that's an acceptable place to lick
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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