u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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