fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
