I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
