you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
