just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
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