i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
