Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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