oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
You need Xanax blowdarts
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
When are your genitals available?
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
