don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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