it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
