nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
