ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
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