Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
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