Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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