I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
