dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
