i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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